It's hard to want to know people anymore. The effort it takes to become folded into their lives is exhausting. Just to be available to text message or answer the phone is too much to ask. It is like I am being hounded. There is a fictional foresight that projects itself and I'm alone at the end.
Almost like that day when it snowed and I was twelve and instead of going outside I said, "it's just going to melt anyway."
Through what I would like to think of as no fault of my own, I seem to have become the alternative to human being. But I'm a freak, not completely delusional.