Wednesday, July 18, 2012

found a poem

Neil Ellman
The Brightness of Martyrdom

Nothing seems
as nothing is
(something perhaps
or was
or what might have been)
what seems blood under a microscope
the blood of martyrs
corpuscular debris
of sacrifice

perhaps the Lord’s
himself
bright
birth
forsaken
death

perhaps
what seems bright
is nothing
as it seems
or was ever meant to be

perhaps the moon
and you
were never born
or meant to be.


from this one: http://asbestosboots.blogspot.com/

timetables.

Time it takes to get to know someone: A week and a half
Time it takes to become bored with someone: A week and a half
Time it takes to hate yourself for earnestly showcasing your best self for nothing: An hour after you realize both of you are bored with each other.
Time spent wondering why you are so dull: The rest of the foreseeable future
Time it takes to bake a simple, white cake: 50 minutes

Friday, July 13, 2012

future plans 2012

i was reminded by a rabbit running through the desert at dusk. white tail up, the rest blending into gentle browns and pinks. the rain has come; monsoon season. and i found something out here. i think it might be new, but it has these old cords tied to it. i don't want to be lonely, so i decide not to be. and i run over the soft red sand. little sea foam scrub brushes tickling. the rain is so cold from so high up. purple clouds and mountains. they reassure. they are always there, even when people aren't. even when i am not. i want to die out here. if i can navigate my old bones to rest next to the dried, hollow cholla cactus..under smooth, ancient ocean green stones, i will have done it right. hundreds of tiny footsteps above.